The Law

There is a saying in Arizona: Come here on Vacation, Leave on Probation.


I will now attempt to make sense of the Arizona DUI laws. First, I am not a lawyer nor play one on TV. I won’t attempt to interpret the law here, just state it as I understand it from reading online Arizona Revised Statues. I have heard through many sources that you do not have to submit to the field sobriety test that the police want to administer. However, as I read the statute, it looks like the officer can file an order to have your license suspended for a year, which will take place 15 days after the arrest. What I was told by the grapevine and have read on various and sundry DUI Attorney sites, was if you are only impaired to the slightest, and you know you don’t appear drunk nor can the officer smell the whisky, decline and make them take you to the station to draw blood. By the time they do this, your blood alcohol content (BAC) will have lowered and you might not get nailed quite as badly.

But I want to talk more about the punishment. This is where it really gets unfair, harassing, and fairly medieval. For a first offense regular DUI, the punishment can be:

1.    No less than 24 hours in jail

2.    Ass-load of fines

3.    License suspension

4.    Traffic school

5.    Alcohol education

6.    Car impound

7.    Ignition Interlock in your car for no less than a year.

I, of course, had what is known as an Extreme DUI. For a first offense, because of my particular BAC, I got:

1.    Over $4000 in fines

2.    30 days incarceration (15 Tent City, 15 Home Detention)

3.    1 year Ignition Interlock

4.    3 month license suspension

5.    30 days car impounded

6.    1 day Traffic Survival School

7.    36 hours Alcohol Education (this is where I learned to work the system)

So, as you can see, you do not want to drink anything stronger than water and drive in the State of Arizona. As a mater of fact, if you walk out of a bar or restaurant (especially in Scottsdale where the police have nothing else to do but create criminals) and you even look at a car, you can get a DUI.


Each and every one of the above mentioned items costs you money, too. This is where it is made pretty obvious that the whole DUI gauntlet in Arizona is a money making machine and really nothing more. It isn’t a deterrent as no one really knows the penalties until it happens to them, then it’s too late. By the way, the ignition interlock device only detects alcohol, yet those charged with a DUI on any other substance (albuterol inhalers, prescription drugs, marijuana) also have to have it installed. Don’t get me started on the MVD, they are a gaggle of retards par excellence. But, as I said, it’s a money making machine. The interlock companies have gotten so competitive they offer all kinds in incentive to go with them. Some offer free installation, coupons for referring friends etc. I have also heard that Avis and Hertz offer cars with the device installed so that they don’t lose revenue due to customers having to have the device. It’s like a medieval chastity belt. It goes with your license, not the car. So if I were to rent a car without the device and was caught, I could be in serious doo-doo.


As for hiring an attorney, that is pretty much a colossal waste of money. Unless the police did something very unorthodox and you can prove it, the punishment is statutory and there is no wiggle room on the part of the defense or the judge. I ended up with a public defender just to see what could be done, but at the end of the day, I got the minimum which is outlined above. My BAC was my scarlet letter and there isn’t anything can be done, except modify the stupid law.


Next - Alcohol Class and the MVD